THE LIST.... 1/12/11

Since the last posting I have learned many things. The web-site TFM comes to mind, and I finished my degree…….. Let’s play catch-up ball.

The List…… yo.

1. The top spot goes to the top team this week. Hail to the champs….. that is all! War Eagle!

2. What is the deal with all these people growing beards? I don’t really understand the whole beard deal. Is it a conversation starter? I personally believe it is a conversation ender. That beard is going to end a conversation with the girl you want to talk to before it even begins….. Oh and you look stupid. Shave.

3. I love people watching with a passion. I was at a gas station recently and this large black man was jamming out while he pumped gas. The song blaring from his truck sounded like some sort of old school tune and it kept saying “Are you lonesome….. Do ya want some?”. So while this guy jams to some baby making tune outside…. I stroll in to get a Dr. Pepper. This woman in front of me is so out of her mind on pain meds… she doesn’t realize the lady speaking to her is her boss from work. It was really just an odd night at the gas station. It had all three phases…. sex, drugs and rock-n-roll.

4. Power bracelets…. Not only do they improve your balance, but they can also cure cancer. That’s only the beginning…. If you’re about to get a speeding ticket then be sure and flash that power bracelet and the cops will quickly leave you alone. If you are poor…. Power bracelet will give you money. If you’re hungry…. Power bracelet will feed you. Power bracelet….. America’s new backbone.

5. Awkward sidewalk moments anger me…… I could be in a great mood and then come up on the person who doesn’t know that you should always move right when approaching head on traffic. They play the “let’s dance and then laugh about it game” with you….. But in all seriousness there is nothing funny about this. I’m not laughing….. because your inability to make a decision just really pissed me off.

6. Recently saw something about where the Kardashians are pairing up with Sears….. Im sorry wha??? Sears? Who even shops at Sears? The Sears in my home town is in a building downtown that Moses molded from clay. It’s old and looks pretty sad. I’m not knocking on Sears or anyone who shops there…. But I’m pretty sure the Kardashians can’t spell it correctly and have probably never been to one either. Sears is unattractive…. The Kardashians should stick to shacking with athletes since every team they touch turns to gold. Saints, Lakers..... When can the Braves get some lovin?

7. Wikipedia will be celebrating a birthday this weekend….. at least that’s what sources say about the web-site that has no real information. Anyone can upload information about anything on Wikipedia…. And maybe it’s just turning eight this year instead of 10…. But nobody really knows because Alan from The Hangover changed Wikipedia’s birthday.

8. Anybody see Cam Newton on Jay Leno the other night? I know nobody watches Leno anymore…. But I tuned in to see Cam Newton. Leno asked Newton…. “Since you won the BCS Title… Ya gonna get rid of that lame ass scooter?” Since when can Jay Leno refer to anything besides his own show as “lame ass”? The jokes are terrible…. Headlines is okay….. But that’s all submitted by other people. Leno sucks.

9. Hey you….. yeah the girl who is always blowing up Twitter talking about garbage. Nobody really cares what you are doing. According to Twitter…. I’m not even following this person, yet every time she makes a sandwich or goes to the gym to run for three minutes and quits…. Guess who gets to see it on the feed? Twitter should be a place for humor and useful posts only. If you’re telling me that you are “sooooo mad b/c you can’t find a parking spot”…… then I have some advice. GET OFF YOUR PHONE AND DRIVE!

10. Did Britney Spears die or something….. haven’t heard anything from her in a while.